All-Star Hawaii Author Notes - Episode 10 (The Spoiler)
by Mario Lanza
Okay, I read through episode 10 this morning and I came up with 15 things I wanted to say about it.
1. "The Spoiler" twist wasn't originally planned to be a part of this story when I wrote it back
in 2002. I originally intended Hawaii to have zero twists whatsoever. In fact, in early parts of the story, Jeff
even says this. He says, "The twist is that there is no twist." But a funny thing happened as Hawaii
started to develop. As the story went along, and more and more episodes started to be complete, I started to get
a little bit bored by its repetitiousness. I started to think, "You know, it's fun to write about Survivor
and all, but now I can see why the producers have started to use twists. If you don't use twists, it's pretty
much the same episode just over and over and over." Because keep in mind, Hawaii was the first fictional
Survivor writing I had ever done in my life. I was sort of figuring out the pitfalls and pros and cons of Survivor
writing as we were going along.
So anyway, we got to about episode nine of Hawaii in 2002, and I started thinking, "Is there some sort of
a twist we can throw in to mix the game up a little bit?" It didn't have to be a game-shaking twist, or a
tribe shuffle or anything. It just had to be something that would add a little extra zing to the later episodes.
So I started brainstorming any sort of little "gotcha" twist that I could throw at the players, just
to keep them all on their toes.
Well as luck would have it, episode nine of Hawaii was posted on the very same night that The Mole 2 aired on ABC.
And sure enough, there was a twist on the Mole that I thought was perfect for my story. Bill (the old guy) was
told that if he put a green thumbprint on somebody else's journal, he would disqualify them from winning any sort
of exemption. I don't remember what Anderson Cooper called this twist, but I remember watching it and thinking,
"That's perfect!" I realized I could do the exact same thing in Hawaii and it would be a fun little
twist. Just have one of the players "spoil" someone else from winning the immunity challenge. This
way, not only could I make the reward challenges extra valuable and important, I could also a fun little political
obstacle the players would have to find some way to work around. By putting my minor new "spoiler" twist
into Hawaii, I could effectively kill two birds with one stone. It was perfect!
Oh yeah, and it would also save me from writing any more gratuitous "X and Y go on a reward cruise and talk
about the game" scenes. I mean, I love those scenes and all, but they are awfully repetivive to write. You
try it sometime. They are always the same.
So anyway, if you are wondering where the idea for The Spoiler came from, there you go. I stole it from The Mole
2. And I implemented it because I was bored. There is no greater or more noble explanation than that. Sorry.
2. I know I've talked about this before, but one of my favorite things to do as an author is to a build
a character up, and then just as quickly send them plummeting right back down to earth. I love to build someone
up with false hope right before they get voted out of the game. This is a tactic I like to call "dropping
the hammer" on a character. Which, I believe, is a term I probably stole from professional wrestling.
In any case, there has never been a more blatant dropping of the hammer on a character as there was in the case
of Kathy in episode 10. In fact, her false hope buildup is so obvious and so blatant in this episode
that I almost think it's a little bit silly. All you have to do is read the first paragraph of the episode, about
how life is suddenly good for Kathy and how the sun is shining a little bit brighter today, and it's a dead giveaway
that she's toast. There is no way Kathy is going to make it through this episode. Because sure enough, here comes
Vecepia, and here comes Tina's betrayal, and-- BAM-- down comes the hammer. Kathy is doomed. I even decided to
get super cartoony over-the-top by making it start raining.
Anyway, yeah, if you haven't noticed, the weather correlates almost perfectly to the Keko's chances in this episode.
When it's sunny, the Kekos are in power. When it's raining, they're not. When it starts raining really
hard, that means they are fucked. I know it's sort of an amateurish way to convey tone in an episode, since it's
so High School Writing 101 and all, but it was fun to do once. I just wanted the tone of this episode to be particularly
nasty and depressing. I promise I won't be that over the top with the weather in the future.
3. This episode has one of my favorite exchanges in any of my stories. I don't know why, but for some
reason this little interplay just kills me. I can totally picture Vecepia and Alicia both saying this.
"Hey that would be sort of funny if we twisted now, huh?" Vee grinned, mischievously.
"And right after you guys turned the game around, too. That would be interesting."
"Oh, shut up."
I can totally picture the looks on both of their faces as they are saying this.
4. The reward challenge was fun. I love writing those "Eliminate your competition by chopping their
coconuts" challenges. They are so fun to do. Because not only are you writing a challenge, you are also
dealing with a lot of nuanced relationship stuff. You get to be very sneaky with your character portrayals. Those
types of challenges are easily my favorite kind to write.
Although, if you pay attention, you will notice that I had people eliminated after one dagger throw as opposed
to two or three. They were eliminated the first time their target was hit. This isn't the way they would have
done this challenge on the real show (nor would they have not given people a chance to get their last licks in),
but in a fictional story I think you have to do it this way. There's nothing more boring to read than a challenge
that just goes on and on and on, like John hit X with a dagger, and then Tina hit Y, and then Colleen hit X again,
etc. That's the way it would go on TV, but in a story you have to condense it a little bit. It's a little rule
I like to call "Make every challenge hit count." Everything that happens in a challenge should have
some bearing on how it is going to end. Otherwise you run the risk of the reader just glossing over the challenge
and skipping to the end.
If you shorten the challenge up, and give each player only one dagger hit to be eliminated, it just reads better.
In this particular case it's not the most accurate challenge portrayal in the world, but these are the things
you have to think about if you are writing a story. You have to do anything you can to cut out any excess challenge
monotony.
5. By this point in the story, Vecepia is easily my favorite character to write. Easily. My second favorite
is either Tina or Gretchen or Alicia. I don't know why, but for some reason I just find Vecepia fascinating to
write. It's fun to write a character who has no particular agenda or strategy. With Vee, you just put her wherever
the action is and watch her adapt. She's the only character I can think of who has no predetermined personality
or agenda I have to work around. She's a blast to work with because, from an author standpoint, you can do whatever
you want with her.
In particular, I love the scene in this episode where Vee goes up to the summit to talk to Gretchen and she uses
her time there to totally undercut Tina. Vee's up there talking to Gretchen, and she's like, "Well yeah,
I'm a snake, sure, but I'm not the one screwing over the Kekos, now am I?" That might be my favorite scene
in the story so far. I love Vecepia's casual ranking scale of snaky evilness. Yeah sure, I'm bad, but at least
someone's worse. Thanks for playing, Tina. See you soon.
I also love how Vee skirts around the whole "Do people just like Tina more becuase she's white?" question.
Because you know that issue would definitely be popping up in real life. In particular, I love the fact that
Vee is deliberately not bringing up this subject in front of the cameras because she knows how it would
look. I don't think many authors would have approached the whole Tina/Vee race angle that way, and I'm glad that's
the way I went with it. Because in this case you can say more by actually not saying more. By having Vecepia
never actually verbalize the fact that she thinks race could be screwing her, I'm letting her make a very valid
argument without coming off like a crybaby at the same time. Because personally, I think she has a very valid
point. I bet people would let Tina get away with more than Vecepia. Which is odd, because if you read
Hawaii you will see they are actually very similar players. They both have similar styles, ethics, and methods
of dealing with people. The only difference I see is that Tina hides behind a fake Southern smile, while Vee
is a little more honest about it. From Vecepia's point of view, it would be like, "Well yeah sure, I'm sort
of a hypocrite, but what do you call HER??"
In any case, I'm quite interested to see where the whole Vecepia vs. Tina angle is going to go. I know where I'd
like it to go, but I don't always have control over these things. I'm interested to see how it turns out.
6. Another scene I really liked in this episode (and I was quite sure that the readers would like) is the
scene where John teases Colleen about being a Rob groupie, and then she gets mad and chases him into the jungle.
That scene wasn't in the original story, it was just something I made up as I was writing episode 10 a couple
of weeks ago. For some reason, it just seemed like we needed some sort of comic relief at that particular moment.
Episode 19 was starting to get a little somber and serious with all the "Gretchen needs to decide" stuff,
and I knew the ending (with Kathy leaving) was going to be super dark as well. So I thought, okay, how can I break
this up in the middle of the episode? What is a really funny scene I can throw in the middle that will change
the pacing a little bit? After all, I would much rather have a low-high-low episode in terms of tone. I would
much rather have you go on an emotional rollercoaster, instead of just beating you over the head with 60 pages
of people being depressed.
So I knew I needed a funny little scene in the middle of the episode. For pacing reasons, it had to be there.
And then I thought, well let's see, which two characters don't have a whole lot to do in this episode? Which
two characters could really use a development scene in the middle of episode 10?
Kathy? Nah. She has enough attention already because this is her boot episode.
Gretchen? Nope. The first 20 pages are all about her.
Vecepia? Nah. I don't think she's really the type to have an over the top comedy scene. She's too reserved.
Alicia? Maybe. But I want people to remember her as angry, resentful Alicia at the end of this episode. I don't
want people to remember her as having a good time.
Tina? Nah. She's too Christian to be funny. I want my scene to be a little bit edgy. Tina is pretty much the
opposite of edgy.
As you can see, at this point that pretty much left only two characters. John and Colleen. Those were the only
two characters who were A) underutilized in this episode, and B) had a good sense of humor. And as an added bonus,
I had already established that John and Colleen had a playful relationship with one another. So at this point
I thought, well now this could be fun.
So I thought, hmmm. What sort of scene could John and Colleen have that would be memorable? How can I break up
the darkness of this episode, and how can I remind people that John and Colleen are funny people? What sort of
scene would people like to see?
And then it struck me. Hey, what if I had John insinuate that Colleen actually had sex with Rob during their little
hangouts together? After all, only a really good friend of Colleen would be able to go there. And isn't John
pretty much Colleen's best friend on the island? Isn't he the only one who would be able to get away with that?
So anyway, that's where that whole scene came from. It was a very sneaky way to A) break up the dark tone of this
episode, and B) remind people about John and Colleen, who otherwise didn't have a whole lot to do in this episode.
Even if they really had nothing to do strategically, I wanted people to see why the two of them would be so fun
to hang around on a daily basis. Besides, for the last few episodes prior to this, I felt that Colleen was getting
a little bit too mopey. She was starting to turn into Kelly Wiglesworth, and that needed to change. She needed
to start having funny scenes again. After all, Colleen isn't a mopey person, she is America's Sweetheart! I
wanted to remind you of that.
7. Okay I bet a lot of you will be find this one interesting.
When I first sat down to rewrite Hawaii, I really only had two goals in mind. Goal number one was "Make the
winner more satisfying than last time" and goal number two was "And do that by rewriting as little of
the story as is humanly possible." See, right from the start I knew that if I started making big wholesale
changes to the story, it would sort of cease being a "rewrite." If I started making big dramatic changes
in episode 1, it would instead become "a brand new story." And I was a little bit frightened by that.
So I sat there, and I thought, well how can I make the ending more satisfying than last time, and how can do I
by doing as little work as I physically can? Well that was easy. All I had to do was reverse the F2 voting.
In the original 2002 version of Hawaii, Alicia defeated Kathy 4-3 in the final vote. So all I had to do this time
was reverse that, and make KATHY win 4-3, and it would be a much more satisfying ending. After all, who doesn't
like Kathy? I figured, if I made Kathy win the rewrite, not only could I keep in essence the exact same story
as I had before (boots and everything), I could send people home happy because she's such a big fan favorite.
On paper, this should have been the biggest no brainer in the world. Kathy winning Hawaii would have been the
most obvious solution to all of my problems.
But then, of course, things started to get complicated.
Once I had decided that Kathy was going to win Hawaii, I started to have second thoughts about it. I started to
remind myself, "Wait a minute. Don't you remember all that garbage in episode one about Kathy not really
deserving to be in this story? Don't you remember how one of your original writers essentially forced you to keep
her in the story back in 2002, when by all rights she was supposed to be the one booted in episode one? Don't
you remember what a pain in the ass that was?"
So I went back and I read my updated episode 1 notes. And sure enough there it was. I spelled it out to everyone.
Back in 2002 Kathy was supposed to be the first boot of All-Star Hawaii. It would have made perfectly logical
sense. We all agreed on it. And then some dickhead on our writing team decided to throw a shit fit about it.
Ugh. I had completely forgotten about that. Writer X refused to go along with a Kathy boot because Kathy was
his favorite player. So we switched it to Teresa, yadda yadda yadda, and Kathy got spared.
Well I read this in 2007 and it suddenly dawned on me that I couldn't just award Kathy the easy win in thr rewrite.
No way. I mean, it would be easy to just switch Kathy and Alicia in the F2 voting this time, it would be easy
to award Kathy the sympathy win, but in essence what I would be doing is just compounding the mistake we made back
in 2002. Because now not only would Kathy have been spared an episode one booting (when by all logic she should
have been gone), she would have also been handed the win on a silver platter. And not because she had earned it,
but because I was too lazy to rewrite Hawaii from scratch. Eek. My goodness, if I had simply handed Kathy the
win in the rewrite, she would have been the single most tainted winner in Survivor history!
So it was at this point that I decided Hawaii had to undergo some massive overhauls. I had to make it a new story
starting at the merge. Because there were no two ways about it. If I had simply handed Kathy the win because
Alicia was an unpopular winner, I wouldn't have felt good about myself as a writer, and I don't think you would
have felt good about yourself as a reader. It would have been the biggest cheap shot cop-out ending of all time.
So that's what I did. I started a brand new story at the merge. I hated to do it, because I knew it was just
going to be more work for me, but it had to be done. I started a new narrative, I gave everybody a clean slate,
I gave every single player a chance to win or lose this game on their own this time (including Kathy AND Alicia),
and Kathy just happened to be the logical choice to leave the game at the final seven. It wasn't because I wanted
her to lose or because I knew it would be a sham if she won, it just so happened that the story logic worked out
that she had to go home. Because there's no way you can read episode ten and think it should have been anyone
else. This was simply Kathy's episode. It had to be her.
And that's why I no longer mind that we were forced to use Kathy after episode 1. The angst has been wiped from
my mind. This time around, the situation resolved itself out honestly and organically. Kathy played a good game,
but she was destined for the jury.
8. You will notice in the immunity challenge that I only posted about five of the ten trivia questions
the players had to answer. You will notice I sort of glossed over the details for the rest of the challenge.
Why? Well it wasn't because I was trying to speed up the challenge or keep it moving. Nope. I did it because
I found it way too hard to come up with ten interesting trivia questions about Hawaii. I tried my best, but it
took way too much time and way too much research, and even then I only came up with five good ones. So at that
point I just said, "Screw it, let's just fast forward through the middle of the challenge instead."
That's why there were only five questions in the challenge.
I hate challenges that require me to do research. Fact checking can kiss my butt. If it were up to me, every
challenge would be a knife throwing one. I just include trivia challenges in my stories every now and then because
A) That's what they used to do on Survivor, and B) At least it's something different for a change.
9. I think it's pretty clear by this point that I have no real clue what to do with Colleen. I have no
idea what her strategy would be, I have no idea what she would be trying to do, and I think you can tell when you
read the story. It's pretty obvious. Colleen's strategy seems to be little more than "Keep my friends around"
and "Try to be sneaky."
Now is this a realistic way that Colleen would probably play the game the second time around? Well actually, surprisingly,
I think that it is. I think this is EXACTLY the way that Colleen would play Survivor if she ever did it again.
Because I'm not the only one who doesn't know what Colleen should be trying to do. I don't think Colleen would
have any clue what she was trying to do either. Because remember, Colleen isn't a hardcore Survivor strategist.
She's Colleen! When it comes to being devious, she's like a little girl trying to dress up in Mommy's clothes.
Deviousness is simply not in her nature.
In any case, yes I know that Colleen's strategy is all over the place right now. But in this particular case I
think it actually serves her character quite well. Colleen's random strategy is perfect for a character like her.
Her strategy drifts because her intentions drifts. One minute she's Boston Rob Junior, and the next minute she
remembers that she likes kittens and bunnies. In her case, I think ambiguity is almost a necessity. She's the
type of character who isn't meant to be pigeon-holed. As I have said before, if she was written the exact same
way in every scene, she wouldn't be Colleen.
10. Again, I have to point out that the rain in this episode is a little bit over the top. I know it was
effective in terms of the storyline (Ahi in power = rain, Keko in power = no rain), but I just want you guys to
know I'm not all that proud of it. I mean, it works, yeah, but it's cliched as hell. If you are a writer and
you want to call bullshit on my rain symbolism, I'll admit that you got me. You win. I confess. I only did
it this way because I wanted episode 10 to be exceptionally dark and miserable, and because rain was the best way
to do it. Trust me, if I could have pulled off a Godzilla attack, I would have gone that way instead. Using a
massive rainstorm and flooding was just easier.
Although in my defense, it does rain quite hard in Hawaii. I flew into Hawaii in the middle of Hurricane
Flossie last summer and it was ridiculous. I have never been to a darker or wetter place in my life.
Alicia is right. Living in the tropics would suck.
11. The fight between Gretchen and Alicia was in the original story as well. Only last time, Alicia was
declared the winner. Gretchen didn't drop an F bomb at all. In the original, Alicia went up and told off Gretchen
for being so unyielding and such a humorless pain in the ass, and the two women went at it. And then Alicia got
her revenge by voting Gretchen out at the final five. The morale of the story in the original was: You don't
fuck with Alicia.
But guess what? In the rewrite, Gretchen won the big fight. I actually reversed it. Think that will
be symbolic in the end of the story? Think Gretchen will find some way to not only steal Alicia's win in the fight,
but her win in Hawaii as well? Hmmmm. I haven't decided. All I know is that if Gretchen DOES win Hawaii, if
for some reason she snags Alicia's win this time around, I want to point to this scene as the moment it happened.
This is the scene where they officially switched places.
Of course, I have no idea what will be happening in the next two or three episodes, so take that as you will.
There are winner clues for every single player left in the game if you know where to look for them. I just wanted
to point out one specific winner clue and explain why I did it. If Gretchen wins Hawaii this time, I wanted there
to be foreshadowing.
Oh yeah, and Gretchen dropping an F bomb on Alicia was just for me. That part was funny.
12. Is John going to win Hawaii? Hmmmm. Could be. He sure looks good now, doesn't he? I love the fact
that Kathy and Gretchen figured out John's strategy about the same time as the readers did. Holy shit. He's
in the final four against three people who can't win (Tina, Vecepia, Colleen)! How did he do that?
I have always had a theory that gay men, in particular, are just inherently good at the game of Survivor. I mean,
it sounds ridiculous, but just look at the evidence. Check out how the gay guys almost always do well in the game.
I mean, seriously, Richard Hatch? Brandon Quinton? Rafe Judkins? Todd the flight attendant? John Carroll?
Some would say Jeff Varner? Check out how many of these guys A) find a way to oust the alpha males, B) team
up with the females, C) find snarky female buddies with whom they can do some serious damage together, and D) have
no remorse with voting anybody out whatsoever. I mean, my goodness. If you're the only gay guy in the cast, odds
are you will be one of the most dangerous players. It happens almost every single season of Survivor!
So anyway, if you're wondering why John is doing so well in Hawaii, maybe that's why. It's because he wasn't stupid
enough to take an alpha position like someone like Lex or Colby or Boston Rob. He was smart enough to hang back,
make social bonds with players like Vecepia and Colleen and Kathy, just sit in the background as the camp cook,
and basically weasel his way into the final four. Or, at least, so he thinks.
What happens in the next episode or two will go a long way towards determining John's fate in Hawaii. He could
win, or he could meet a very quick and very ugly fate. Frankly, I'm sort of rooting for the guy. He is a fun
character to write for. I'm glad I toned down his aggressiveness a lot from the original.
Like Kathy so expertly deduced, meek little John the Camp Cook is probably the single most powerful player in this
game right now. If the women don't get rid of him soon, he's in for the win.
P.S. Always beware the gay guy. I'm telling you. If you ever wind up on Survivor, target him FIRST.
13. I love the irony that Gretchen gave all this great advice to Kathy about what to do next ("Tell
them to watch out for John! Don't look desperate!"), and now she gets to follow her own advice herself.
How did that happen?
Gretchen probably has no idea why she is still in this game. She is probably sitting there on day 31, saying to
herself, "Well if they want to keep me around, then why not? Let's see just how dangerous I can be."
Or as Tina would be saying right now, "You idiots!"
I don't know. For some reason it just tickled me that Gretchen would give all this strategic advice to Kathy,
and then would get to follow it herself. If you're wondering why the target of the vote changed from Gretchen
to Kathy as the episode went along, that's why. Kathy was ALWAYS going to be the boot at the end of this episode.
I just had the Ahis do a flip flop because I wanted a scene where Gretchen advises Kathy on what to do afterwards.
Seriously, that was the only reason I tried to hide the boot at all. I wasn't trying to make the boot a surprise.
I wasn't trying to trick anybody. All I wanted was for Gretchen to become an unlikely (and somewhat surprised)
vigilante.
14. One line I loved in this episode is the line at Tribal Council where Jeff remembers why he doesn't
call on Vecepia to give answers. He doesn't do it because everything she says is completely down the middle, and
boring as hell. He HATES players like her. As a host, she offers him nothing.
If you haven't guessed, that line was a shout out to all the people at Survivor Sucks who think that Vecepia is
characterless and uninteresting. But I wasn't doing it to agree with you. I put that line there as a way to point
out the flaw in your thinking. The problem (as I see it) is that you are just looking at Vecepia from strictly
an entertainment perspective. You are looking at her from a viewer/host perspective. You just see her as boring
and uninteresting.
If you were to look at Vecepia from more of a character perspective (as in, how would I write Vee in an
episode?), you will see she's actually not boring at all. As a player, she goes out of her way to appear
unexceptional. All she wants you to do is to think she is a nobody. That's exactly why she's so dangerous.
15. My absolute favorite thing about Episode 10 is the fact that Kathy's revenge against Vecepia failed.
I love that she came so close to getting her back, and it didn't happen. She was outwitted by Vecepia
the exact same way as before. The only difference is that this time around, Kathy knew what she was up
against, and she still lost. I love the delicious irony in that. Sometimes life doesn't quite work out the way
that you like.
I don't think many authors would have had Rob laughing from the jury box as Kathy gets her torch snuffed. Most
authors would have written this as a simple Kathy revenge storyline. But for me? Well I like to keep you on your
toes. I don't like to be predictable. Every so often, I like to see Inigo Montaya get stabbed by the six-fingered
man and die.
Ha ha. This has nothing to do with me not wanting Kathy to win. I love Kathy. I just like the fact that some
storylines just don't work out for people. Sometimes in Survivor, life sucks.
My apologies to all the Kathy fans out there.
16 (bonus). Oh yeah, one final thing before I leave. Out of all the things I have ended up dropping from
the original story, the one that has been the saddest for me (even moreso than "The Defiant One" storyline)
was the original ending to episode 11. Because that was the episode that Kathy herself actually helped me with
(back in 2002). With Kathy now out of the game, her contributions will have to be scrapped.
Here's some backstory if you're not familiar with this. In the original episode 11 (in 2002), I ran into a problem
where there was probably going to be a 3-3 tie. Three of the characters were lined up on one particular side of
alliance, and three of the characters were lined up on the other side of an alliance. And as a writer, I had no
idea what to do. I didn't really want to have a 3-3 purple rock draw, but at the same time it was pretty obvious
that every character was dead set on forcing a tie. The only character who could possibly go either way
was fictional Kathy, and I was sort of torn about what she would do about it. Would Kathy force a tie? Or would
she avoid a purple rock? I couldn't decide.
So what did I do? Well I did what any right meaning Survivor fan would do in this particular scenario. I went
to Kathy Vavrick-O'Brien's official website and I asked her. I said, "Hey Kathy you don't know me, but I'm
writing this story for Survivor-Central, yadda yadda, and I've come to a fork in the road." I gave her some
backstory, I gave her all the info she needed to know, and I asked what she would do.
And do you know what? She actually wrote back!
To my dying day, I will always say that Kathy Vavrick-O'Brien is the coolest Survivor I have ever met. She knew
nothing about me, she had no idea who I was, yet she went out of her way to not only explain how she would play
this particular situation, she actually wrote five paragraphs explaining WHY. She was the first Survivor I ever
had any meaningful contact with, and I will always be grateful for the help she gave me as a nobody writer back
in 2002. As a nostalgic person, the fact that I had to dump my Kathy advice sucks.
Oh well. Thanks for everything, Kathy. You were the best.
P.S. Kathy's decision actually cost her the win in the original Hawaii. Shhh. Don't tell her. Had she gone
the other way with her decision ("I would have forced a tie and spared John") she would have beaten Alicia.
Episode 11 is coming soon. I have no idea what it will be called and I have no idea what is going to happen.
I guess we will find out soon. It should be a good one.