Early Show Transcript
May 11, 2004
------------------------------
MICHELLE: Thank you for having me here today Julie. I promise to try and not turn this into a 1000-page
response. I see that CBS has their finger on their bad *bleeped* word bleeper button, so I'll try to keep my cussing
to a minimum. #*$#&@!! Ha!! *wink*
JULIE: First before we get to the questions, I have to say, that's an interesting shirt you have on.
MICHELLE: Oh, this old thang! (NOTE: real southern accent here) *camera pans down to show shirt that says
"B.O.T.M.C" and small words underneath "Bitch of the Month Club"* On the back is our motto...
*stands and turns around* "Why be a Witch when you can be a Bitch!" My friends made me this t-shirt.
(On a personal note, one of my friends really did make me that t-shirt...lol)
JULIE: Well, ummm. Interesting. That certinally sums you up. *quickly trying to move on* How about we get
to some questions?
MICHELLE: Sure thing Julie! I've been looking forward to this for a long time... hit me with your best shots!
*quickly reaches down, picks up and shows the camera a bottle of Midol PMS: the official sponsor of Michelle's
Early Show*
QUESTION: What was the story behind "Muntz"?
MICHELLE: I've been a Survivor fan since Season 1 (go Gretchen) but not until this year did I really start
checking out different Survivor web sites. Basically hung around only 1 site and it wasn't Murtz's...sorry big
guy. I knew from the "tone" of everyone when I visited Sato that Murtz was important but I had no clue
as to who he was. I had stumbled on Survivor Central earlier in the year. It was an honest mistake on my part.
It's something we can laugh about because of my lack of knowledge. Now I bow to the ultimate Survivor fan. *bows
before Muntz... I mean Murtz*
QUESTION: Why did you agree to hide your marriage from the rest of the cast? I know it's been said before
that Chris told you to, so you did it... but what was the logic behind it?
MICHELLE: I have no good answer for this question. *laughs* Call it blind trust. The idea came about when
Chris and I went out on our first water run together, which was hilarious (I'll post that chat later)... we hit
it off immediately and Chris thought it would be a good idea, so I said "Yes". Logic... I'm not sure
if there was real logic behind it beyond we thought the guys were male control freaks and thought we could use
it to our advantage. YEAH RIGHT!!! Talk about a dead end. It was one of the stupidest things I ever did in the
game because it just led to trouble. Sure, I didn't mind lying in the game but when David googled me, I had to
come up with some story as to why I told everyone I was single. I scrambled. I hated lying about my "fake"
divorce. I avoided the subject whenever possible. Isabella was always asking me if things were OK, and I absolutely
hated lying to her about this. But what I find funny is Isabella never caught on to that I was lying... and I honestly
think she was concerned... and each time I lied to her about it, I felt guilty.
QUESTION: What the hell happened between you and Chris to get him voted off? Please for the love of God
tell us your side of this for a change. And why on Earth did you warn him in the first place?
MICHELLE: O.K. *whew* This is the one question I knew I'd be asked because it's such a controversial topic.
No matter how hard I or Chris try to explain what happened, I honestly don't believe anyone will ever fully comprehend
everything that went on. There is so much he said/she said with this whole incident, I'm not sure it will ever
be cleared up. Suffice to say, I have always told Chris and whomever else asked, that I am 100% responsible for
Chris being voted out and I take full responsibility for it. The anger you saw in the game was an outward expression
of my inner conflict. I couldn't hurt myself and punish myself for what happened to Chris, so I took my anger toward
myself and lashed out at those around me. Chris and I have gone back and forth on responsibility... he says he's
responsible because he chose to try and save me/get Amy out. I say I'm responsible... maybe one day we'll come
to a mutual agreement on who was responsible (**coughmecough**). The game is over and I will own up to my mistakes...
and this was my fault and I take full responsibility.
QUESTION: If Chris had made the merge...what damage would have been done?
MICHELLE: My answer is biased because of how much I love Chris (kisses Sugar *wink*), but if Chris had made
the merge, the showdown between Isabella and Ryan would have been child's play. Chris would have destroyed her
and rolled through to the final 2. Now, would he have won? I don't know because he would have been sitting next
to me. *wink... feels the glare of the other castaways* It's one of those things we'll never know but I can tell
you, Hurricane Naughty Hotties would have caused a hell of a lot of drama, confusion and chaos had we been reunited
at the merge.
QUESTION: Michelle, the Beth situation was a pretty harsh one back in Episode 7. We've heard her story of
"Camp Hell," but I'd like to hear yours now.
MICHELLE: There is no simply way to answer this question. Oh wait... yes there is!!! I was 100% prime time,
grade "A" bitch. The events of Camp Hell are long and detailed. I recently finished my post-game interview
with Chris, and I went into specifics and behind the scene details in that interview. So, if you'll be patient
and wait until that interview comes up, your question will be answered. If after that interview, you still have
more questions, I will be happy to answer them.
But let me just take the time to say I take full responsibility for all my actions on New Kamiya. What happened
to Beth, Matt and Dave was avoidable and unnecessary. In my opinion we (Mike, Ryan, Isabella and myself) were all
wrong in the way we treated them. Some would say Isabella didn't do anything wrong, she felt sorry for them and
tried to help them. BUT don't forget, she didn't try and stop the treatment we gave Beth, Matt and Dave. In my
opinion, not standing up and saying something (going along with what happened) makes you just as guilty as those
of us who were screwing around with their heads. In short, I was a #$@%! idiot at New Kamiya... aka Camp Hell.
QUESTION: Why specifically did you throw the stars at Mario the gnome? If you had the chance, would you
have finished the job? And what did you think of all the ensuing drama?
MICHELLE: Gnomegate... what a mess. *laughs* In my wildest dreams I never thought the fallout would be that
huge. Here's what happened:
Mario and I were IMing each other and joking around. One of us said something JOKINGLY about the gnome getting
hit with the star... we laughed and I said "Sure, I'll hit it" and we laughed some more. When Mario summed
up our daily tasks he put down that the gnome was hit.
I didn't think Mike would take it so seriously and while some of it was an act on his part... Mike freaked me out!!
I did not do it out of mean intent... it was just a joke that got way out of hand. The aftermath scared the crap
out of me... I can only imagine the fear that Matt felt. I honestly felt sorry for Matt taking all the crap for
something I did, but after I saw how Mike went after Matt, there was no way I was going to admit to being the one
to hit the gnome.
Ya'll know what? (and that is a real southern typed accent not a fake one *coughIsabellacough*) I really liked
Mario the gnome, especially since I was the one who suggested his name. Yes, there were times when I wanted to
throw him into the fire, like when he tried to make the moves on me in the middle of the night, or when I'd catch
him putting on my underwear, but I liked the little guy. So, no, as much as it would make some people happy (and
I can understand why) I could not have destroyed the gnome.
QUESTION: If Isabella wasn't immune every time, if and when would you have voted her off?
MICHELLE: I would have voted Isabella off in a heartbeat if she wasn't immune after the Ryan TC and at any
point afterwards if she was vulnerable. (borrows Joni's glare... stupid wheel) Joni and I had long talks about
how great it would be to vote her off. Heck, I was so into the game, I probably had a dream about snuffing out
her torch. I'll let ya'll imagine how I snuffed it out. (totally joking)
QUESTION: What was it like to see Joni in the Jury Box after you got voted out?
MICHELLE: I was terrified because I knew I had let her down and, more importantly, hurt her. More than one
jury member approached me and told me that Joni was upset and I should talk to her. I know it might seem strange
to many, after reading Okinawa, that I would be concerned or upset with hurting someone (ex. Dani, Dave, Beth,
Matt) but it was different with Joni. Joni and I were close from Day 1, closer than what was shown in the story.
Joni is like my little sis and I was scared to talk to her... scared she'd hate me.... scared I lost a friend/sis.
Because our schedules conflicted, I wasn't able to IM her right away, but I wrote her an email and apologized and
asked her to forgive me for letting her down and hurting her. Soon after that we were able to talk and work everything
out, but until we actually talked I was nervous, scared and terrified.
QUESTION: When and why did Mike become your real final 2 partner?
MICHELLE: Ya know, I gave Mike a hard time during the story.... picked on him a lot. But my turning point
for Mike, as in when I felt I could trust him, was when he stood by me in the tie vote for Beth. I knew he did
not vote for me and he was willing to take his chances and force the tie. After that vote was over, I told him
I owed him one and would watch his back... and I did. He gained my full trust after that TC. Yes, I knew he was
working the jury and I had fun at his expense over it, laughed and joked about it.
Mike became my real F2 partner after Joni was voted out. Yes, Mike and I had a side deal and while I had side deals
with everyone except the gnome, and Lance (NEVER HAD ANY DEAL AT ANY TIME WITH LANCE... Hogan says I had a deal
with him and an email confirming the deal. I don't remember it but if he says I had one, then I had one), Mike
was one option I was always keeping open and was one of the 3 options I had that in my mind were real and viable.
Option 1) Joni. After Chris left, if Joni was there when the merge happened, I wanted the two of us to go all the
way. Option 2) I had an F2 with Isabella but she threw that out the window when she turned on Kamiya at the Ryan
vote. But when it became obvious after each IC she was going to be around, taking her to F2 was a good option for
me because people may have not liked me but I didn't think they liked her either. It was my hope they'd at least
respect me a little bit more than her. Option 3) Mike. But he turned into option #1 after the Joni vote... and
I was going to do everything in my power to take out Isabella and get Mike and I to the final 2. Unfortunately,
my plan backfired. In fact, I hated Isabella so much after the Joni vote that if I had been in the final 3 and
it was Isabella, Amy and I, and I won final immunity, I would have taken Amy to F2 just to stick it to Isabella...
even if it would have cost me the game.
Now, to make this even longer, let me show you the crazy, mixed-up mind of Michelle. If Joni, Mike, Isabella and
I had been F4, the question remains, how would I have gotten Joni past F4 because Isabella and Mike were gunning
for her? Here is my untold plan as to what I would have done. PRAYED!!! Seriously, Joni or I would've had to win
the F4 immunity. If she would have won immunity, I would have liked to target Isabella. If I won immunity, Isabella
and Mike would have tried to take out Joni. I would have done everything in my power to persuade Mike to vote out
Isabella. In the end, to ensure Isabella was the one to go, I would have given my immunity to Joni at TC, not telling
anyone beforehand I was going to do this... hopefully catching Isabella off guard. Knowing both Mike and Isabella
wanted to take me to F2, I would take my chances on Mike voting Isabella. If we ended up in a tie, (Joni and I
voting Isabella, Isabella and Mike voting me) I don't believe Mike would have chanced the dagger for Isabella.
He would have switched his vote and she'd be gone. Final 3 Mike, Joni and myself. Because I had an F2 deal with
both, I would have thrown the final IC, making the winner choose, thus guaranteeing myself a place in the F2 because
neither one of them would've taken the other. Oh, what a tangled web we weave! That was my untold plan that I was
never able to use.
QUESTION: Did you ever consider switching on Mike?
MICHELLE: No. Not once did I consider switching my vote. I argued with Isabella for hours over this vote. I
even tried to get her to give me her immunity as a sign of "trust" on her part. When it became apparent
she wasn't going to budge, I had no choice but to lie to her. If I hadn't told her I'd vote Mike, I believe she
would have gone to Mike and tried to get me voted out. Lying to her kept me safe.
We sent in our 1st vote Friday night and on Saturday the votes were read. Mario had a rule which stated that once
you cast your vote you could not change it. Immediately after I sent in my original vote I turned around and sent
in my comments and 2nd vote. Nothing Isabella or Amy said could have changed my mind... and if given the opportunity,
I'd do the exact same thing again, even if it meant me leaving the game. One thing I wish I would have done is
send Amy an email right before silence period began. I knew Isabella was sending her an email saying she was voting
for Mike. I should have sent Amy an email saying something to the effect of "Nice playing with you. Emma and
Mike told me they are voting me out and I figure you are voting with them. blah... blah... blah..." If I would
have done that, maybe it would have confused Amy and caused her to vote for me. I have no idea what, if anything,
that might have done but it was a good idea... just didn't think of it in time. Oh well!
QUESTION: What went through your head as you realized that you were the one who had gotten the purple rock?
MICHELLE: This may be hard to believe but I felt complete and utter peace. I know that sounds strange. I
wasn't upset, I wasn't angry, I wasn't mad... I was peaceful. I had a strong feeling when Mario sent out the results
of the TC that I was the one eliminated. Something inside me told me I was done... but I felt total peace about
it. Even today, I have a calming peace about my fate in the game.
QUESTION: Looking back - do you wish you would have voted for Mike, just so you could have stayed in the
game? Or would you have still stayed by his side?
MICHELLE: I have no regrets about not switching my vote and I'd do the same thing again. I'll be honest,
the Joni vote pushed me to my limit. I'd had enough of Isabella pushing me around. I turned on Joni and hurt her...
she was my friend... I consider Mike a friend and I was not, under any circumstances, going to do the same thing
again. And if I had to do it all over again, I'd still force the tie. When I came into this game, I said I'd do
anything to win, but in the end, I found out I couldn't. I thought with the Joni vote I could separate friendships
from the game, but I discovered the hard way that I couldn't... that was my downfall.
QUESTION: Who have you kept a relationship with outside of the game?
MICHELLE: I have a very close relationship with Chris. He has an open invitation to visit Nashville anytime
he'd like. I also have a close relationship with Joni. Those are the two people I am closest to and talk to the
most. I also talk to Isabella, Beth, Murtz, and Mike, but not as much. I distanced myself from many of the players
in Okinawa because of post-game drama and I had a real life I needed to deal with, didn't want to deal with game
drama after the game was over. I hope the cast knows if they want to talk to me, they are free to email me (using
my old game email addy) or send me an IM on the board. Oh, I haven't talked to Amy in a while but we've recently
emailed and would like to talk to her more often... and I miss talking to Ryan. I don't see him online much anymore.
QUESTION: Did you and Isabella make up, or do you still "hate her guts?" And what is your opinion
of Isabella playing as Emma?
MICHELLE: Isabella and I have kissed and made up. (That still makes me laugh... *wipes tear from eyes*)
I no longer "hate her guts" but I did not like Isabella post-game. It took me a little while to let my
emotions toward Isabella go because I was so emotionally involved in the game. From October until mid-December
I was online every day from 5:30 until 11 PM or later. I was with Isabella the entire time I was in the game. We
talked every day for over 2 months. You spend that much time with someone, you develop a bond. I felt as if Isabella
only got to know me for game purposes, not because she actually wanted to know me. We had some very good and personal
conversations... and what I viewed as her betrayal hurt. With help from Psychologist Mario, I was able to work
through my feelings because he understood what I was feeling. He helped me see that Isabella is the master when
it comes to separating personal feelings from the game... and I learned not to take what she did personally.
Now I have the utmost respect for her. As far as I'm concerned, what happened in the game stays in the game. My
personal opinion of Isabella is she is a wonderful human being, great sense of humor, and once you get to know
her (aka.. she opens up and lets you know her) you find a person who has a lot of love... she loves her family
and friends and cares for them deeply.
As far as Isabella playing as Emma... to each their own. She did what she thought she had to do for her best interests.
QUESTION: Have you made up with Joni? Have you made up with Chris? Have you made up with Beth? And were
there any more making ups to be done?
MICHELLE: I've made apologies to those who I know with 100% certainty that I hurt such as Beth, Joni, Chris,
David, Matt and Dani. The only one who, from their reaction, has not accepted my apology is Dani. I send her an
IM after the game was over and I recently (in the last 2 months) have emailed her an apology. (And no, it wasn't
a 1,000 page email.) But she was short and distant in our IM and she never responded to my email. I've done all
I can do in that situation, if she still has bad feelings toward me, then she has to work through them. I've tried
to right my wrongs, and that's all I can do. With Dani, I was really concerned about how badly I hurt her and while
I still am sorry she was hurt, because of how she's reacted since my apology, I am not losing any sleep over it.
I have real life issues to deal with, the game is over, let's just move on.
QUESTION: Do you ever plan to play Survivor again? If so, would you change your strategy? And would you
consider playing under a fake name?
MICHELLE: First let me say props to Jake, someone I have recently gotten to know and who is a great person.
Now, to your questions, yes, I would play Survivor again, and I would take what I learned from this game and apply
it to the next. In fact, I just finished playing another game.
A new strategy... hmmm... should I admit to this or not? Ah, what the heck. I don't like UTR (under the radar)
players because they sneak up and bite you in the butt if you aren't careful. That being said, I would go UTR.
In fact that is what I did in the game I just finished. I went against all my instincts and played so UTR some
people thought by the end of the game I was Isabella. I am proud to say I played this last game without hurting
anyone like I did in Okinawa. It goes to show that you can teach an old dog new tricks.
I chose to play this last game under an assumed name because I could not take the chance of people in the game
knowing me from Okinawa. I was a ruthless player in Oki and I did not want to carry that "stereotype"
or "baggage" into my new game simply because Oki changed me and I didn't want to be judged for how I
played there.
QUESTION: You seemed to have a lot of emotional reactions to people in the story. Both good (you and Chris,
you and Joni, you and Mike) and bad (You and Lance, you and Isabella, you and Beth). So how real were those emotions
and which ones were just for show? How much of the real Michelle did we see?
MICHELLE: I guess what is both good and sad is that who you saw in the story was 100% me. I never played
for the camera, never said catchy phrases just to be noticed, never slammed anyone just for the sake of air time.
If someone pissed me off, I reacted and said what I felt, no holds barred. If someone made me happy, then I expressed
happiness. I laughed, I cried, I yelled, I went through the range of emotions in this game. Emotionally, I made
myself vulnerable or, I think, exposed myself emotionally more than any other player. Talk about putting your neck
out on the chopping block... emotional vulnerability is a scary thing, especially when people you don't know will
be reading and judging you. Sometimes the results were ugly but they were also honest.
QUESTION: How do you feel about the way you were edited? Do you feel like you were portrayed fairly?
MICHELLE: I have no problem with the way I was edited because who you saw was me. I never played for the
camera, I never put on a fake show, I never hid who I was. I showed all my emotions in the game. For better or
worse who you saw in the game is who I am when I am competing because I go balls out 100% of the time. Would I
edit the negative things I said? No, because that was how I felt at the time I said those things. The key there
is AT THE TIME. Do I feel those same feelings now? No, because the game is over. I left what was in the game in
the game.
I was edited very fairly and have no complaints. Mario can only write with what he's been given. Were there softer
moments I had that weren't shown? Yes, but I don't think they were cut out to make me look bad. Time constraints
made some things unnecessary. One thing the readers don't know is that I have a wicked sarcastic sense of humor
and I do wish that was shown more, but beyond that, I'm thrilled with how I was written. (On a side note: I have
printed off every episode, and when this is over, I am going to go to Kinko's and have them turn it into a book.
One day I'll be able to show my kids what their mom did! Of course, I'll have to edit out all my cussing... DAMN
IT!!!)
QUESTION: Did you consider yourself a hero or a villain while you were playing Okinawa?
MICHELLE: Hmmmm... good question. I was both. I like to think of myself as Darth Vader. He started off a
good kid, the right intentions, the right motivation, but then something happened. His emotions took control and
he went to the dark side of the force where he wreaked havoc and chaos reigned. Eventually, he came to a point
where circumstances forced him to look at who he was and those circumstances changed him, leading to his death
while saving his son. His death resulted in him being reborn or restored to good side of the force. Parallels me...
kind of spooky. I was a hero, villain and then hero. (Oh, and my hubby loves the fact that I was a villian.)
QUESTION: What was your biggest mistake in the game?
MICHELLE: This is an easy question... finally! Whew! Not telling Joni she was being voted out. Not telling
Joni changed my entire game. I know I could not save her... trust me, I tried. I argued with Isabella for hours,
but I knew there was nothing I could do. Yes, I voted for her but that was minor because even if I did vote with
Joni, she would have been gone. My mistake was not telling her. If I would have told Joni, I would not have felt
like I betrayed a friend and my thinking going into the next TC would have been VERY different.
QUESTION: What one event, if any, was the single most important thing that happened to the game in Okinawa?
MICHELLE: This depends. I can answer it two ways: What was the most important thing that happened to me
in the game, or what do I think was the most important thing for everyone. For me, it was not warning Joni about
being voted out. That completely changed me and my game. No one will understand the guilt I had, the pain I felt
because I hurt a friend. I hurt someone who trusted me and that devastated me. I literally cried over my cowardliness
in failing to warn her. I have no excuse as to why I didn't. Yes, I was completely stressed and feeling overwhelmed
because I had just spent the better part of 4-5 hours trying to defend her against Isabella, Mike and Amy... but
to not send her a simple email... inexcusable on my part.
For everyone in the entire game... the two freaken twists of Mario: tribal switch, which threw strategies to the
wind and made people adapt... and also the freakin' wheel. UGH!!! That wheel was a thorn in my side... loved it
but hated it!
QUESTION: Can we expect a Sue Hawk-type speech in the jury since either Amy or Isabella, or even both, will
be in the final two?
MICHELLE: Oh Boy!! Now, I would hate to disappoint anyone, but we'll just have to wait and see. *evil smile*
And just remember, it may not seem like it, but there's always a method to my madness. Feel free to follow up with
me after the game is over on this question and I'll explain what exactly I mean by this.
QUESTION: In your opinion, who was the single best player of Survivor: Okinawa?
MICHELLE: This is a two part question. You'll have to wait until my jury speech to find out the 2nd part because
I clearly state in my speech who I thought at the time were the TWO best players and to this day, those feelings
and thoughts still hold true! *smiles and hints to Mario to put my comment of best players in the story*
As for part 1... this is going to ruffle a few feathers but ya'll know me, I'm blunt and honest. Ryan, David, Chris
and Matt... all great players and I totally respect their gameplay. BUT... that being said, I believe I TIED for
being ONE of the two best players in the game. (and I'm not saying this to be cocky)
Why do I think I was ONE of the TWO best? Simple, two reasons. First, this will surprise some but I used my bitchy
brashness to propel me further in the game.
Yes, some say my emotions were my downfall, but I played the game as me, not some alias. I didn't hide who I was,
I was 100% me. I didn't have to keep up an act, or play to the cameras. I didn't worry about kissing up to the
jury. I wasn't worried about being some great character for Mario to write. I didn't care if I came across as good
or bad. Each and every day I was simply me. Many of the things the other castaways worried about, I didn't. Yes,
I was a bitch... but damn, what a great strategy to have.
Oh, wait... yep you read right: STRATEGY!! I used my own bitchiness to my advantage. You saw how it worked for
me. Mike, Isabella, Joni... and I can't speak for Amy... but they wanted me in the F2. Take the loudmouth bitch
who can't control her emotions. That is what I wanted, and that is what would have happened. Mike had his gnome
strategy, I had my megabitch strategy! *laughs* Lance was the only one to figure this out, no one else did. I'll
give him props for seeing what I was up to.
Second, my killer instinct. I've always been ultracompetitive and love to go for the "kill" so to speak.
That means I'm not afraid to take chances, even if it ends up biting me in the butt... and I never gave up.
After the game is over, I'll be more than happy to explain part two of this question and why I think the unnamed
person was the best in the game, but for spoiler sake, I can't say right now.
QUESTION: Did you have fun playing Okinawa?
MICHELLE: I loved playing Okinawa. This was one of the best experiences of my life. Yes, there were moments
where it was extremely stressful and I got carried away. I let my emotions get the best of me, but despite all
the ups and downs, I had the time of my life.
JULIE: Wow! Mario was right - you are long winded.
MICHELLE: Yeah, I know. Sometimes I just don't know when to shut up.
JULIE: Yes, well, umm... I couldn't agree with you more.
MICHELLE: *does a double take at Julie for her last comment* Thanks again for having me here today, Julie.
This was a blast! Keep reading... this roller coaster called Okinawa only gets better!!!
Back to the Okinawa Transcript Page