Jerri asking her question to Tina and Colby
The Funny 115
#99. The Beef Jerky Chronicles
Australia - Finale and All-Stars - Episode 9
This isn't really a "moment" per se, it's more like a six-year running
joke. It's something that started
in Australia, it continued in All-Stars, and it would probably continue
to this day if you asked Jerri about it
in an interview. You see, it's the story of Kel and the beef jerky. And
it's a lot funnier than you might expect.
Okay, this one needs a little back story first.
In the second episode of Survivor: The Australian Outback,
Army Captain Kel Gleason was accused of possessing
some smuggled beef jerky. The Ogakor tribe claimed he was eating it in
the woods by himself, they jumped all over
him, and he was voted out of the game 7-1. The editing of the episode
made it look like he had been voted out
over the beef jerky, but post-game interviews with the cast made it
clear he would have been voted out anyway. Kel Gleason was a loner who
never really fit in with his peers, and that's why he was voted out
unanimously in
episode two. The "beef jerky" incident really had nothing to do with
the truth, yet it made for sensational
TV so that's of course what everybody remembers.
Anyway the biggest controversy around the beef jerky at the time was
the fact that Jerri Manthey had been the one
to make the accusation. Jerri claimed she had seen Kel chewing
"something brown", and the whole witch-hunt
started with this accusation. In other words, the "beef jerky"
controversy had always started and ended
with Jerri Manthey. She made the accusation at the time, she has had to
defend it over the years, and she is well
aware that people haven't always believed her side of the story. Jerri
has always been on shaky ground with the
general public... especially about this subject... and for that reason,
sometimes she has had to defend herself.
And this is where the story starts to get fun.
Jerri's first encounter with "beef jerky backlash" came in the
Australia finale. It was one of my favorite
moments of the season and it happened when Jerri was asking questions
at the final Tribal Council. Jerri stepped
up to address the two finalists, and she asked the very benign
question, "Are there any moments that you regret
in the game?" She seemed to be looking for an apology, but needless to
say Tina had other plans in mind. Tina thought it would be more fun to
slam Jerri right to her face.
Jerri asking her question to Tina and Colby
Tina simply smiled and said, "The moment I regret most in this game was
at Ogakor when someone accused
Kel of smuggling beef jerky. Somebody said, 'Check his bag!" and I was
standing right there, so I went
through it. And afterwards I thought, oooh I wish I hadn't done that."
"Someone accused him of having beef jerky."
Jerri's facial reaction as Tina was speaking.
Tina said this with a big smile on her face, in that oh-so-sweet
accent, and it was one of the funniest moments
of the whole season. Because she had managed to call Jerri a liar... to
her face... in response to her own
jury question! But the best part was that Tina (the master of the
implied putdown) had done it so subtly that
Jerri couldn't even respond. Jerri just got this annoyed "you bitch"
look on her face and Tina just
smiled ever-so-sweetly back at her, like she didn't realize what she
had done. It was a really funny and subtle
comedic moment.
"Sit down, Jerri."
"Tina, you bitch."
Oh yeah, and if you're wondering why Jerri wanted to vote Tina off
first in All-Stars, just go rewatch this moment. Tina made
condescending comments like that around Jerri all the time. Remember
this one? "I try not
to cook rice anymore because I don't want to be judged." That
one probably single-handedly got Tina voted
out of All-Stars.
So anyway Tina's jury answer was funny enough on its own (probably good
enough to make this list), but there was
actually a follow-up moment in All-Stars that I thought was even better.
Because once again it involved
beef jerky, and once again it involved Jerri. Only this time... Jerri
was the one doing the spin control. This time, she wasn't going to let
anybody beat her to the punch.
It happened in the ninth episode of All-Stars when Chapera received
tree mail about the upcoming immunity challenge. The players were told
that the next challenge would involve "Survivor trivia" and it would
test how
well they all knew the show.
In order to prepare for the challenge, the Chaperans started
reminiscing about past seasons, in an attempt to brainstorm
how much they knew about former events.
The Chapera tribe comparing notes about past Survivor seasons
Sure enough, standing there at the head of the pack was our old friend,
Jerri Manthey. You see, she knew a lot
about past seasons. And she especially wanted to
share with them what had happened in Australia. And
I'll never forget how hard I laughed when I heard Jerri confidently
remind the Chaperans that:
"Keith couldn't make the rice. Kel got caught with beef jerky."
Oh really? Caught? Was that the exact way it went
down, Jerri? Kel was caught by the producers? Seems
to me like it was more "suspected" or "accused"? So anyway, Jerri
making the leap to saying
Kel was "caught" has always been one of my favorite moments of
All-Stars. She says it so confidently,
without a shred of doubt in her voice, that if you don't stop to think
about it you actually might believe her. You actually might forget
she's still playing the spin control game.
Four years later, and Jerri is still trying to convince the world that
she was telling the truth...
P.S. Yes I know that Jeff Probst believes Jerri's story. He has always
said that he thinks Kel had some sort
of food on him. But that's still a far cry from saying that Kel was
"caught." You might as well say
that Kel was "eaten by crocodiles" too.
P.P.S. Here's my predicted email response from Jerri: "Mario, why must
you include this moment on the list? Why? Why? Can't you see that the
beef jerky incident is tearing this column apart? Can't you see that!?
These
moments on the show were deadly serious at the time... yet instead you
put them here and they get ridiculed. So
yes people might enjoy your countdown, but at what price? At
what price???"
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