#34. The Incredible Melting Man

34. The Incredible Melting Man (1977) - Season 7, episode 704
"Oh great. The movie has to mop up after itself now."

Plot: An astronaut gets hit with radiation, and he starts melting.
Famous for: Being the one MST3k episode that might be too gross for most people.

"He'd make a pretty good dip with taco chips."

My favorite riff:  I don't remember too many standout riffs in this episode, I just remember it being consistently funny from start to finish. Which is rare for even the best MST3k episodes, most episodes aren't as consistently funny as this one is. 

If I absolutely HAD to pick one favorite riff from this episode, there's one scene in particular towards the middle of the movie. A lady is looking for an intruder in her house in the middle of the night. And for whatever reason, the director decided to add a bunch of annoying musical stings to the scene, just to make things more dramatic. And after a while, Mike and the Bots start adding their own crazy musical stings too, just to make things more fun. And it's one of those scenes that is impossible not to laugh at, because it starts to get quite silly. Every two seconds, Mike and the Bots are adding a FWISH! or a THWIP! or a ZWOP!

This is one of those scenes that is impossible to quote, because it's all sound effects. But when I think of the funniest riff from this movie, that's the one I remember.


"I had my breasts lowered and my hips pulled out at odd angles. I hope that's okay."

Comments:  For whatever reason, this is one of those movies that never seems to show up on anyone's list of favorite MST3k episodes. But every time I watch it, I find myself laughing a lot.  So either I'm right, and everyone else is wrong... or maybe I just have a higher tolerance than most people do for disgusting special effects. And jokes about gooey melting apple heads. I don't know.  

All I know is that every single time I watch The Incredible Melting Man, at the end I find myself thinking, "Man, that one was really good. That has to be one of the most underrated MST3k episodes."

"I'm not gonna look silly in this shot, am I?  I will maintain my dignity?"

"Why is she running through the E-Z mini storage?"

By the way, for me, the signature scene in this movie comes at the very end. When a janitor has to literally pick up what's left of the hero, scoop him into a garbage can, and then mop up after him. If that doesn't sum up the experience of watching The Incredible Melting Man, I don't know what does.  

"Ah, I never understood white people."

Also, I can't believe people actually went to see this movie in the theater at one point.  

It's not the worst movie I have ever seen in my life but... my god.

"So he was tomato-based then?"

Other personal favorite things about this episode:  One word: "Hotchka."

No one knows what the hell it means. But they sure do get a lot of use out of it.


Trivia: I remember reading somewhere that this movie was originally supposed to be a comedy. It was intended to be a parody of horror movies. But then, at the last minute, the studio got nervous, and they cut out all the comedic scenes. And they decided to make it a straight-up horror movie instead.  

And anyway, that's how you wind up with a stupid little gooey horror movie that takes itself waaaaay too seriously, has special effects that are waaaaay too gross for their own good, and is perfect for MST3k to riff. Sometimes life just works out perfectly like that.

"Remember when everyone had one of those giant black velvet moth posters?"

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