Soo Hok
The 115 Funniest Things to Ever Happen on Survivor
#16. Soo's Speleng
Borneo - All Season Long
Soo Hok
It was the summer of 2000, and tonight was the premiere of a brand new
television show called Survivor.
All across America people gathered 'round their TV sets, hoping to
catch a glimpse of this fascinating new televised
sociology experiment. And they were not disappointed. In the first
episode alone we saw mystery. We saw intrigue. We saw betrayal. We
saw epic conflict.
And by the end of that first episode, there was just one burning
question on all of America's mind. There was
one unanswered question that was on everybody's lips, as the reality of
the Survivor premiere finally sank in.
The question?
All across America, people were asking one another... "Did that lady
really write SOUNA on her ballot?"
That's right, we're talking about Sue Hawk, the worst Survivor
vote-speller in the history of the game. She cast
the very first vote in Survivor history (for Souna), her spelling was
consistently bad throughout the remainder
of the series, and it became one of the best (and funniest) running
jokes of the Borneo season. I mean, just check
out some of Sue's wonderful vote-spelling attempts below:
Sue votes for Colleen
Sue votes for Gervase
Sue votes for Richard
Sue signs an autograph for a fan
I'm just kidding. Sue didn't really spell all the
votes "Souna." That was just the first one. But she really did misspell
nearly every single vote for the entire rest of the season. It cracked
me up at the
time, it was one of the most popular things for people to make fun of
on the Survivor message boards, and it truly
did become one of the funniest things about Survivor: Borneo.
Let's take a look at how many names Sue actually spelled correctly
during the first season, shall we?
EPISODE 1: Soo votes for Sonja. More or less.
Souna Kristefur
EPISODE 3: Soo votes for Stacey. And the spelling
is correct! DING DING DING DING!
EPISODE 5: Soo votes for Dirk. Ohhhhh, so close.
EPISODE 7: Soo votes for Gretchen. Forgot the T!
EPISODE 8: Soo votes for Greg. And she's correct!
DING DING DING! Although in all fairness, if
she had managed to misspell "Greg", she would
officially be retarded. So she only gets half-credit
for this one.
EPISODE 9: Soo votes for Jenna. BUZZ. Wrong!
(Note: Although she did technically spell it
better than Heidi
did...)
EPISODE 10: Soo votes for Gervase. A valiant
attempt, but still wrong. It all looks the same in the loss
column, you know.
EPISODE 11: Soo votes for Colleen. And she did it!
She actually got the double L's and double E's. Way
to go! That makes one in a row!
EPISODE 12: Soo votes for Sean. DING DING DING
DING! That's two in a row! Although to be fair,
it's entirely likely that Sean spelled the name for her first (and/or
even wrote the ballot for her). So the jury
is still out on this one.
As you can see, Sue's ballot spelling was one of the most memorable
running jokes from Survivor: Borneo. And I very
nearly called it the funniest Borneo moment overall on the Funny 115,
although
two Borneo moments wound up
edging it out in the end. Still, this is one of the all-time classic
running jokes in Survivor history.
By the way, I'll never get over the fact that the very first ballot in
the very first Survivor episode was Sue
Hawk's vote for "Souna". Use that as a trivia question ten years from
now, and see who remembers it. I bet that not that many people will.
P.S. Did Sue's spelling get any better during All-Stars? Well, she only
had one chance to cast a vote (in episode
three) before Richard's penis outsmarted, outplayed, and outlasted her.
But did Sue spell that one ballot correctly? Did she actually nail the
name "Rob" without a single grammatical mistake? Let's take a look:
Damnit, she just can't win!
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