The Funny 115 - version 2.0

#81.   Fun Times with Grandma
Heroes vs. Villains - episode 1

Okay, now we're back to one of my favorites.  We're back to James Clement.  In fact, in another entry I think I already called him the single most underrated funny character in Survivor history.  

James Clement, aka Captain Giggles.

In episode 1 of Heroes vs. Villains, James Clement sits down and he gives us one of the funniest, most awkward confessionals in Survivor history.  

It's not the flashiest moment on the Funny 115.  It's not the most memorable.  It certainly won't have the longest writeup.  But if you are looking for a scene where a guy takes a story that really isn't all that funny, but he somehow -makes- it funny, then you need look no further than James explaining the fun times he had with his great great grandma when he was a kid.

James?  Care to take us back to those magical halcyon days on the old chicken farm?

Has grandma issues

It's episode one of Heroes vs. Villains, and the Heroes have just managed to catch three chickens who were out wandering around in the jungle canopy.

And you know what that means when you have ten starving players on your tribe.

Free chickens?  Starving castaways?  A boiling waterpot?

That means it is time for a chicken feast!

No longer under Shambo's protection

So anyway, J.T. walks over to one of the chickens and... well, as someone like J.T. would do... he decides to kill it old school.  He takes the chicken.  He picks it up.  And he twists its neck around until its little brown head pops off.  

J.T. picks the chicken up and starts twisting its neck

Sugar watches in horror

Amanda recoils in disgust

The Chicken Slayer

Although the rest of the tribe is completely horrified by this ritualistic chicken deheading, there is one member of the Heroes who isn't all that grossed out by it at all.  Because, you see, there is one member of the Heroes tribe who actually has witnessed something like this before.  

James Clement watches, and is reminded of his childhood.

In fact, this whole chicken deheading ritual sort of reminds him of a very touching memory from his youth.

We zoom in... as James takes us on a nostalgic flashback back to his younger years

-Insert Wayne's World Flashback Arm Motion-

"(laughing)  Yeah J.T., he did it old school.   He just grabbed it by the neck and spin it around 'til it was done."

"My great great grandmother did that to me one time when I was three.  And scared the life out of me."

"She took one and grabbed it by its neck and spun it around and popped his head off, and then let it run around.  It was traumatic."

"Like we were screamin', we didn't know what to do."

"And, I don't know.  (pause).  It was good times."

"(laughs)  Kind of.  Kind of... very.  (pause).  It was traumatic.  (struggling)  But it was good... it was funny..."

"(pause)  It's funny now."

Ah yes.  James Clement.  One of my favorites.

The only person alive who could make a traumatic story about his grandma deheading a chicken both disturbing and sweet.


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