The Funny 115 - version 2.0

#86.  Matty's Turkey Gobble
Gabon - episodes 8 and 10

Okay now this is one of those special entries on the countdown.  Not because it's like super amazing or super memorable or anything, but because there is absolutely no way you can appreciate it until you see it.  

Or, I guess in the case of this particular entry, until you hear it.

Matty Whitmore

In episode eight of Survivor: Gabon, the Survivors are competing in an immunity challenge where they have to hold two poles up in the air for as long as they can.  And, as the challenge winds down, it turns out that the final two are going to be Matty and Bob.  

Or, as they have been portrayed up to this point in the season, Matty the cool, calm younger guy, and Bob the cool, calm older guy.

Matty and Bob.   Or, as they are known in US Weekly magazine, "Mob."

So here we have Matty and Bob, two mature, respected competitors, engaged in a life and death battle for immunity.

Matty struggles to keep his poles up in the air.  That's what she said.

Matty focuses on a happy place- like the day Alan Thicke gave him a new bike on the set of Growing Pains.  

And this is where Matty does something which is... well... a little bit memorable.

First he turns over and starts taunting the old guy:  "Aint no thing, Bobby boy!"

And then he lets out one of the most bizarre, unique, distinct mocking laughs I have ever heard in my life.   Seriously, I have no idea where this sound comes from.   I'm not sure it is even supposed to even exist in nature.  Matty just opens his mouth and it sounds like a duck got raped.

Ah ha ha ha ha ha.

I swear to God, I just rewatched Matty's weird laugh about 30 seconds ago and it still kills me.  I've seen it about twenty times and it never gets old.  I have no idea how this guy who is usually so composed can pull off that sound.

And then what's great about this scene is that Matty doesn't stop there.  Even though he's about 106 years younger than Bob, he thinks it would be a good idea to keep on taunting the old guy.

Matt turns to taunt Bob some more

"Consarnit!  You there stop that, boy!"

Matty lets out another one of his weird laughs.

At this point even Jeff Probst has to finally step in.  He tells Matty to shut his pie hole and stop laughing at the old guy.

"Matty's gonna be laughin' his way right to Tribal Council... You need to stop jabberin' and start concentratin'."

Now I know what you're probably saying.  You're probably reading this and thinking, "Well yeah, okay Matty has a weird laugh.  I guess that's kind of funny.  But #86 on the Funny 115 funny?  Really?  Better than Coach's Poem?  Better than the Almighty BobDawg?"

Well the entry isn't over yet, my friend.

No, what makes Matty's weird laugh so epic, what makes it so incredibly memorable and hilarious and awesome, is the fact that-- two episodes later-- the weird laugh comes back!

And it comes back in an even better form!

Episode 10 Immunity Challenge

It's the episode ten immunity challenge, and Matty, Corinne, and Kenny are competing to build what is more or less a giant row of dominoes.  They are supposed to stack wooden boards in a row (while maneuvering around ropes to get to each section), and whoever can make their stack fall from domino one all the way to the end will win immunity.

And... again... there's no way you can appreciate what happens next until you hear it.

Matty starts taunting again

Matty is climbing through his ropes about midway through the challenge, and he decides to let out his weird high pitched little warbling laugh again.  To taunt the other competitors.

Only I swear to God, it doesn't sound like a laugh.  This time... it sounds more like a turkey gobble.

I shit you not.  Matty Whitmore opens his mouth, and he gobbles.  He fucking gobbles.

There is no other way to describe the sound that comes out of his mouth.


Seriously, if there is one moment that you need to see (hear) in person, it is Matty's turkey gobble in episode 10 of Survivor: Gabon.  It happens quick, and if you aren't listening for it, you might miss it.  But once you hear it there is no way you will ever watch Gabon again and not look forward to it.  

I don't care if it was just edited in from episode 8 (or some other episode) or not.   I have no idea how a sound like that actually comes out of a human being.

P.S.  Okay I suppose I better bring this up because a lot of people have asked me about it recently.  Yes, there is a YouTube channel where all the Funny 115 moments are all being uploaded.   One of the fans of the Funny 115 is posting videos for every  entry, just like someone else did for the original Funny 115.

I bring up the YouTube channel here for three reasons:

1. The first reason is that no, I have nothing to do with the YouTube channel.  That is a fan created site, I have absolutely nothing to do with it.  I appreciate that the videos are there because they are fun for people to watch, but please stop asking me when I am going to put the newest videos up.  I have no control over any of that.

2. You'd be surprised how many people ask me this question, but it happens at least once or twice a day recently so I figured I better clear it up.  Yes, the Funny 115 came first, and then the YouTube videos came afterwards.  It is not the other way around.  The YouTube videos are only there as an homage to the countdown.  Again, you would think that would be obvious from the way they are written, but you would be surprised how many emails I get about this every week, asking why I am "ripping off" the YouTube channel.

3. Despite everything I just said, the YouTube channel is awesome and really well done, and the guy who does them is putting a lot of work into it.  And if there is -one- video you need to see rather than just read about it, it is Matty's weird laugh.  Words just can't do it justice.  Just go check it out on the YouTube video whenever he gets around to posting it.  You won't regret it.

P.P.S.  Oh yeah, and I know the other thing you thinking when you are reading this.  You are probably thinking "How can you write about Matty and not even mention his smile?!  Dude, what's up?  His smile is as weird as his laugh!!!"  Well never fear, my friends, because Matty's smile gets its own entry later.  :)  

"Hey you guys hear that?  You hear that garblin'?"

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