The Funny 115 - The Third One

#66. Carolyn and the Amazing Resting Bitch Face
Worlds Apart - all season long

In season thirty of Survivor, we were introduced to a fierce new competitor who was liked and respected by all, who was amazing in the challenges, and who came very very close to winning the game.

No, not Will

No, I can only be talking about Carolyn Rivera, aka "Mama C."  

Who not only came exceptionally close to winning Worlds Apart, you could easily make the case that she probably should have.  But didn't because middle aged women tend to get screwed during this particular era of Survivor.

Carolyn has a message for the Worlds Apart jury

Oh, and also the fans that didn't vote her back in for Cambodia

So anyway, you have Carolyn.  Who was smart.  And who was fierce.  And who was a great competitor.  And who above all was just the all-around package.

But I don't want to talk about any of that.

No, I'm here because I want to pay tribute to that amazing resting bitch face that she has.

Do you know what a resting bitch face is?  Chances are, if you have spent any time on the internet over the past twenty years, you probably do.  

A resting bitch face is, quite simply, when a person has no expression on their face, yet they somehow just naturally look mean.  Or unpleasant.  Or unapproachable.  Or they somehow look like they are sneering at you.

Or, in the case of Carolyn, sometimes you get all four

Resting bitch faces are not new.  In fact, they are not even specific to females.  The first resting bitch face in recorded history actually came back in Ancient Greece, when playwright Aeschylus pointed out that rival playwright Euripides always appeared as if he had a stick up his butt.

Resting bitch faces are not new, they can't be controlled, and they are nothing to be ashamed of.  Heck, my teenage daughter even has an amazing RBF, and she is quite proud of it.  She claims it is great because no one at school will ever approach her, so she never has to talk to anyone.

Also, I should point out that Carolyn wasn't even the first Survivor to have an amazing resting bitch face.  Ami Cusack back in Vanuatu probably had the best RBF before Carolyn came around.

The patented Ami sneer

More Ami

Ami was great at this face.  But Ami was also no Carolyn Rivera, which I am about to demonstrate for you.

And so here we go.  My Top 20 moments of Carolyn having an amazing resting bitch face in Survivor: Worlds Apart.  

As one of my readers, Tom Dube, accurately pointed out, "It's most prominent in scenes when she's listening to someone. She has this little facial feature where she curls her lip, which almost makes it look like she's snarling at whoever is talking."

And with that, enjoy the countdown.  

This one was a lot of fun to put together.  :)


#20. When you have to listen to Rodney

#19. When you have to listen to Joaquin

#18. When you have to listen to Shirin

#17. When you're stuck on a tribe with Max

#16. When you realize you lost a returning player vote to Kelley Wentworth

#15. When you first see Dan in his manties

#14. Great sympathy for Jenn being stung in the cooter

#13. Fuck you.  Seriously, just fuck you.

#12. I'm on Survivor, this is my dream

#11. Hi, I'm Mama C, please approach me

#10. Sierra, you make a great point and I am happy to hear it

#9. When you have to listen to Mike

#8. When you see Mike doing the god damn happy dance

#7. When you get no airtime at the reunion show

#6. Yay!  I get to deliver toys to kids!

#5. When Hali keeps going on and on about the Constitution

#4. When they accidentally include Rodney in your vanity shot

#3. When you have to listen to people and be all social and shit

#2. When Shirin won't shut up about what a big fan she is

And, of course, the most glorious Carolyn RBF of them all...

Found at 32:17 of episode ten...

#1. When you're stuck on Worlds Apart and this is your peer group

And so there you have it.  My tribute to a player that a lot of people don't remember, but who was absolutely one of the most entertaining characters in one of the most entertaining seasons.  I mean, if there's NOTHING else you like about Worlds Apart, just watch it to see Carolyn (and to a lesser extent Jenn) just standing around and reacting to stuff.  Some of the faces she makes are just glorious.

And, to be fair, Carolyn isn't always like this in the episodes.  When she gets animated and happy and smiley, she is as giddy as anyone.


But man is that RBF spectacular when she decides to break it out.

In fact, we even see a variant of it in her very first shot in the intro.

Boy I hope that nine foot tall bearded guy isn't on my tribe

So here's to Carolyn.  One of the underrated gems of what I consider the most underrated of the modern Survivor seasons.

When you see Dan sexy biting an M&M again

In fact, I think I'll wrap up this entry with a quote from Max from one of his post game interviews.  This one sums up Carolyn's success as a player in a nutshell.

"In one of my exit interviews I was asked why I didn't realize that Carolyn had flipped when it was so obvious in the episode.  And my answer was that she always had the same RBF so it was impossible to gauge her emotions."  

** Thank you to kidnifty for the FUBC/Worlds Apart picture **

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