The
Funny 115 - The Third One
#88.
The Bromance is Real
Worlds Apart - episode 6
It's day eleven of Survivor: Worlds Apart, and Rodney on the blue
collar tribe has a problem.
Rodney's problem?
He doesn't have any friends in the game.
He is all alone.
Plus one of the girls on his tribe has a tattoo on the side of her damn
face
Now,
in most Funny 115 entries, this is where I would start making jokes
about Rodney not having any friends in the game. This is
where I
would compare his sadness about being all alone to Fabio's sadness in
Nicaragua when NaOnka smushed the bananas. In most
entries,
this is where I would veer off and this entry would turn into something
bizarre.
Except, in this case, I don't need to do that.
You
see, in Rodney's case, there is already a book out there that
perfectly describes his pain (and his subsequent story arc) over not
having any friends. In fact, if you are a fan of childhood
and
developmental psychology, you are going to love it.
That book?
Whoops,
that's not it. Here is the book. It's the
textbook I
used when I was a psychology major back in college.
Maslow says you better relax, bro
If
you were go into the developmental psychology book, and you were to
look up the chapter on isolation and social development, here is what
it would say about the plight of poor Rodney.
"Emotional instability is very
common
among isolated children. A child may be fearful of a situation, whether
it is one-on-one or among group of people, but this is only one emotion
that is close to the surface. Other emotions that occur when an
isolated child is around other people include anxiety, stress, and
apprehension. These basic emotions may compound to create panic
attacks, depression and other issues."
Sierra watches Rodney having a meltdown
As
you can see, without a friend on the tribe, Rodney is at risk for
developing a
number of personality issues. Including, but not limited to,
depression, anxiety, fearfulness, lethargicness, and worst of
all, the complete inability to ever do shots and have a Sunday
Fun Day. In fact, you can further see Rodney's
plight in the following quote which comes directly from Freud.
So
anyway, this is the problem that faces poor Rodney. He has no
friends. He is completely alone in the game. And
unless a
parent or an educator or Luc Longley himself steps in to remedy this,
he is going to face very serious problems as he moves on with his life.
A lonely child will never have a prime time story
But then, in episode six, suddenly something changes.
Without warning, there is a twist.
Rodney's new tribe
Rodney gets rid a bunch of his old tribe members.
He is given a bunch of new tribe members.
And standing there, in his new shiny blue buff, is the friend and role
model that young Rodney has desperately been searching for.
His name is Joaquin. And he pledges allegiance.
Yes, Joaquin Sourball Souriblie
Sorblanski Some-French-Word
joins the Blue Collar tribe in episode six, and just like that, Rodney
now has a friend.
In
the first few days of their bromance, the two young men do everything
together. They camp. They fish. They
hunt. They
love. But not in a homosexual way, that's for sure.
In
fact, in terms of social psychology, Rodney and Joaq very easily
display the famous "Six Stages of Friendship" that behaviorist William
Rawlins lays out in the Developmental Psychology book. See
below.
Stage 1: Role-Limited Interaction
-
This is when two people make the first contact. Since neither
person knows how this friendship is going to end up, they are wary
about revealing personal information.
Stage 2: Friendly Relations -
This is when small talk starts and you legitimately decide if you want
to be friends or not. You talk about interests, hobbies,
experiences, etc. and “seek to determine whether our interest is
reciprocated”
Stage 3: Moving Toward Friendship
-
At this point, people started spending time together voluntarily and
look to expand on the friendship. You also increase breadth
and
depth by talking about attitudes and values.
Stage 4: Nascent Friendship
- Interaction between the two people becomes regularized and standards
or stereotypes you put on friendships is eliminated with this
person. People set up their own rules.
Stage
5: Stabilized Friendship
- Here, both parties depend on the friendship and the two
people
count on each other automatically. They trust each other,
share
intimate information, and expect that you will be friends for a while.
Basically,
now that they have reached the fifth stage of friendship, Rodney and
his BFF Joaq are now apples and oranges two peas in
a pod. At
this point, they
are tighter than Rudy's asshole when he walks into an S&M bar.
They essentially do everything together.
Including the psychological concept of "modeling"
What is modeling?
Well let's get our old friend Freud to explain this one to us.
In
layman's terms, modeling is basically when Person 1 does shit
and
then Person 2 does the exact same shit, because they think
the first person is cool and they want to be just like them.
Here is modeling. That kid better relax.
Here is some protocol typical modeling
And guess what happens when Rodney thinks Joaq is cool and
he wants to be just like him?
He even picks up one of his buddy's facial expressions!
But
wait, is modeling not enough for you? Well let's go to the
next
step. This is where we get to the really insane Single White
Female level psychology shit.
Yep, you guessed it. Now we get into mirroring.
Hey Freud, you got any pearls for us about this
one?
Yep, Rodney just loves to mirror his new best man-friend Joaquin.
Here is mirroring
Here is mirroring
Hey Joaquin, I am like you. I feel the same.
Now,
sadly, Rodney and Joaq never actually get to the famed sixth and final
step of the Friendship Pyramid. Which I believe is actual
penetration, although I'm not 100% sure since I was too lazy to
actually go look it up.
Although in all fairness, Joaquin sure does have a sweet ass
Sadly,
Rodney and Joaq are only a few days into their bromance when, all of a
sudden, they are torn apart by the most sinister and
evil force
imaginable.
No, not Leif.
It is this guy
Mike
Holloway, aka the scumbag redneck, aka the scared silly little baby,
notices that Rodney and Joaquin are getting super close together.
And like the scared little baby that he is, he vows to tear
it
apart.
Mike doesn't even have sex, yet he still knows how
to fuck you
The scared redneck baby decides that he is going to throw
the next challenge to get rid of one of the bromancers.
And that is exactly what he does.
And just like that, the greatest bromance in the history of
Survivor is no more.
*smuff*
And Rodney, of course, can only look on in sadness as his one and only
Survivor friend has been voted out of the game.
By the way, the developmental psychology book has a chapter
on this subject of Rodney's development as well.
ABANDONMENT - When
children are raised with chronic loss, without the psychological or
physical protection they need and certainly deserve, it is most natural
for them to internalize incredible fear. Not receiving the necessary
psychological or physical protection equals abandonment. And, living
with repeated abandonment experiences creates toxic shame. Shame arises
from the painful message implied in abandonment: "You are not
important. You are not of value." This is the pain from which people
need to heal.
You are not important, Rodney. You are not of
value.
Rodney is abandoned now
Rodney feels toxic shame
As
you can see, there is much we can learn about developmental psychology
from the friendship of Rodney and Joaquin. It is the great
American story of loneliness, and isolation. It is the tale
of
pulling oneself up by the bootstraps.
It then turns into a tale of friendship, and
mirroring, and companionship.
And frottage
But in the end, it turns out to be a tale of
loss and abandonment and grief. And only because one scared
little redneck baby decided that Rodney should be his Luc Longley
instead of his Scottie Pippen, and he made Rodney burn husks.
Which even Freud would agree, was complete horseshit, bro.
At
the end of the day, I hope you have enjoyed this little foray into
Rodney's adventures with Joaquin, as well as developmental and Freudian
psychology.
And
remember, if you are ever looking for a new BFF in the world, you
should probably ask Joaquin. I hear he has an
opening for a
best friend these days.
P.S. Here is a great interview that Joaquin did
after the show.
How fast did the Rodney bromance happen?
Oh,
man. If we had had four or five more episodes? Forget it. It would’ve
been too much for TV. We were hilarious together. It was nonstop jokes
back and forth. We were a riot. It was exactly what they showed on TV.
Two bros, waking up after spending time with people they’re not
accustomed to being with, finally being able to talk about normal
things you would talk about back home with your friends. It was
amazing. I’m still friends with him. I talk with him almost every day.
He came down to New York, we spent New Year’s together, we popped
bottles, got a handful of girls, had a great time, partied at my house
and didn’t stop until ten in the morning the next day. Nonstop. I’m
going to visit him next week. He’s my brother. He’s my brother for life.
The bromance is alive?
The
bromance is real.
P.P.S. This
entry has only been up for six hours and I've already got some great
feedback from Reddit. I can't believe I missed this joke in
the
writeup.
P.P.P.S. Here is a great picture that
a reader named Ari Ferarri
sent in. Here is Rodney going through the four stages of loss
after
his BFF is voted out.
P.P.P.P.S.
** Special thanks to
kidnifty
for the Brad Culpepper/Troyzan picture **
