The Funny 115 - The Third One

#88.  The Bromance is Real
Worlds Apart - episode 6

It's day eleven of Survivor: Worlds Apart, and Rodney on the blue collar tribe has a problem.

Rodney's problem?

He doesn't have any friends in the game.

He is all alone.

Plus one of the girls on his tribe has a tattoo on the side of her damn face

Now, in most Funny 115 entries, this is where I would start making jokes about Rodney not having any friends in the game.  This is where I would compare his sadness about being all alone to Fabio's sadness in Nicaragua when NaOnka smushed the bananas.  In most entries, this is where I would veer off and this entry would turn into something bizarre.

Except, in this case, I don't need to do that.

You see, in Rodney's case, there is already a book out there that perfectly describes his pain (and his subsequent story arc) over not having any friends.  In fact, if you are a fan of childhood and developmental psychology, you are going to love it.

That book?

Whoops, that's not it.  Here is the book.  It's the textbook I used when I was a psychology major back in college.

Maslow says you better relax, bro

If you were go into the developmental psychology book, and you were to look up the chapter on isolation and social development, here is what it would say about the plight of poor Rodney.

"Emotional instability is very common among isolated children. A child may be fearful of a situation, whether it is one-on-one or among group of people, but this is only one emotion that is close to the surface. Other emotions that occur when an isolated child is around other people include anxiety, stress, and apprehension. These basic emotions may compound to create panic attacks, depression and other issues."

Sierra watches Rodney having a meltdown

As you can see, without a friend on the tribe, Rodney is at risk for developing a number of personality issues.  Including, but not limited to, depression, anxiety, fearfulness, lethargicness, and worst of all, the complete inability to ever do shots and have a Sunday Fun Day.  In fact, you can further see Rodney's plight in the following quote which comes directly from Freud.

For a good example of this, go back and re-read my entry about Rodneyisms.

So anyway, this is the problem that faces poor Rodney.  He has no friends.  He is completely alone in the game.  And unless a parent or an educator or Luc Longley himself steps in to remedy this, he is going to face very serious problems as he moves on with his life.

A lonely child will never have a prime time story

But then, in episode six, suddenly something changes.

Without warning, there is a twist.

Rodney's new tribe

Rodney gets rid a bunch of his old tribe members.  

He is given a bunch of new tribe members.

And standing there, in his new shiny blue buff, is the friend and role model that young Rodney has desperately been searching for.

His name is Joaquin.  And he pledges allegiance.

Yes, Joaquin Sourball Souriblie Sorblanski Some-French-Word joins the Blue Collar tribe in episode six, and just like that, Rodney now has a friend.

In the first few days of their bromance, the two young men do everything together.  They camp.  They fish.  They hunt.  They love.  But not in a homosexual way, that's for sure.  In fact, in terms of social psychology, Rodney and Joaq very easily display the famous "Six Stages of Friendship" that behaviorist William Rawlins lays out in the Developmental Psychology book.  See below.

Stage 1: Role-Limited Interaction - This is when two people make the first contact.  Since neither person knows how this friendship is going to end up, they are wary about revealing personal information. 

Stage 2: Friendly Relations - This is when small talk starts and you legitimately decide if you want to be friends or not.  You talk about interests, hobbies, experiences, etc. and “seek to determine whether our interest is reciprocated” 

Stage 3: Moving Toward Friendship - At this point, people started spending time together voluntarily and look to expand on the friendship.  You also increase breadth and depth by talking about attitudes and values. 

Stage 4: Nascent Friendship - Interaction between the two people becomes regularized and standards or stereotypes you put on friendships is eliminated with this person.  People set up their own rules.

Stage 5: Stabilized Friendship -  Here, both parties depend on the friendship and the two people count on each other automatically.  They trust each other, share intimate information, and expect that you will be friends for a while.

Basically, now that they have reached the fifth stage of friendship, Rodney and his BFF Joaq are now apples and oranges two peas in a pod.  At this point, they are tighter than Rudy's asshole when he walks into an S&M bar.  They essentially do everything together.

Including the psychological concept of "modeling"

What is modeling?

Well let's get our old friend Freud to explain this one to us.

In layman's terms, modeling is basically when Person 1 does shit and then Person 2 does the exact same shit, because they think the first person is cool and they want to be just like them.

Here is modeling.  That kid better relax.

Here is some protocol typical modeling

And guess what happens when Rodney thinks Joaq is cool and he wants to be just like him?

He even picks up one of his buddy's facial expressions!

But wait, is modeling not enough for you?  Well let's go to the next step.  This is where we get to the really insane Single White Female level psychology shit.

Yep, you guessed it.  Now we get into mirroring.

Hey Freud, you got any pearls for us about this one?

Yep, Rodney just loves to mirror his new best man-friend Joaquin.

Here is mirroring

Here is mirroring

Hey Joaquin, I am like you.  I feel the same.

Now, sadly, Rodney and Joaq never actually get to the famed sixth and final step of the Friendship Pyramid.  Which I believe is actual penetration, although I'm not 100% sure since I was too lazy to actually go look it up.

Although in all fairness, Joaquin sure does have a sweet ass

Sadly, Rodney and Joaq are only a few days into their bromance when, all of a sudden, they are torn apart by the most sinister and evil force imaginable.  

No, not Leif.

It is this guy

Mike Holloway, aka the scumbag redneck, aka the scared silly little baby, notices that Rodney and Joaquin are getting super close together.  And like the scared little baby that he is, he vows to tear it apart.

Mike doesn't even have sex, yet he still knows how to fuck you

The scared redneck baby decides that he is going to throw the next challenge to get rid of one of the bromancers.

And that is exactly what he does.

And just like that, the greatest bromance in the history of Survivor is no more.


And Rodney, of course, can only look on in sadness as his one and only Survivor friend has been voted out of the game.

By the way, the developmental psychology book has a chapter on this subject of Rodney's development as well.

ABANDONMENT - When children are raised with chronic loss, without the psychological or physical protection they need and certainly deserve, it is most natural for them to internalize incredible fear. Not receiving the necessary psychological or physical protection equals abandonment. And, living with repeated abandonment experiences creates toxic shame. Shame arises from the painful message implied in abandonment: "You are not important. You are not of value." This is the pain from which people need to heal.

You are not important, Rodney.  You are not of value.

Rodney is abandoned now

Rodney feels toxic shame

As you can see, there is much we can learn about developmental psychology from the friendship of Rodney and Joaquin.  It is the great American story of loneliness, and isolation.  It is the tale of pulling oneself up by the bootstraps.

It then turns into a tale of friendship, and mirroring, and companionship.

And frottage

But in the end, it turns out to be a tale of loss and abandonment and grief.  And only because one scared little redneck baby decided that Rodney should be his Luc Longley instead of his Scottie Pippen, and he made Rodney burn husks.  Which even Freud would agree, was complete horseshit, bro.

At the end of the day, I hope you have enjoyed this little foray into Rodney's adventures with Joaquin, as well as developmental and Freudian psychology.

And remember, if you are ever looking for a new BFF in the world, you should probably ask Joaquin.  I hear he has an opening for a best friend these days.

P.S.  Here is a great interview that Joaquin did after the show.

How fast did the Rodney bromance happen?

Oh, man. If we had had four or five more episodes? Forget it. It would’ve been too much for TV. We were hilarious together. It was nonstop jokes back and forth. We were a riot. It was exactly what they showed on TV. Two bros, waking up after spending time with people they’re not accustomed to being with, finally being able to talk about normal things you would talk about back home with your friends. It was amazing. I’m still friends with him. I talk with him almost every day. He came down to New York, we spent New Year’s together, we popped bottles, got a handful of girls, had a great time, partied at my house and didn’t stop until ten in the morning the next day. Nonstop. I’m going to visit him next week. He’s my brother. He’s my brother for life.

The bromance is alive?

 The bromance is real.

P.P.S.  This entry has only been up for six hours and I've already got some great feedback from Reddit.  I can't believe I missed this joke in the writeup.

P.P.P.S.  Here is a great picture that a reader named Ari Ferarri sent in.  Here is Rodney going through the four stages of loss after his BFF is voted out.


** Special thanks to kidnifty for the Brad Culpepper/Troyzan picture **

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