The Tale of Na Onka and Fabio
Chapter 8
Fabio, I Don't Like You
Na
Onka knows that Fabio is going to be spared the guillotine tonight.
No matter how unfair it all is, he is going to survive.
U mad, bro?
But that doesn't mean she can't fire a couple warning shots across his bow at Tribal Council.
You know.
Just so he's aware that she's coming for him and all.
Fabio looks on evilly as Na Onka wonders which charity she should donate her Survivor winnings to after the season is over
At
one point during Tribal, Shannon asks Sash if he's one of them funny
New York fellas who prefers the company of other men.
Not a fan of the cock
And Fabio delights as his two tribesmates get into a big fight over the issue.
Good.
Goooooooood.
Hahahaha. Dance for me, puppets. Dance!
And then... Na Onka decides to finally strike a blow for the good guys.
When she declares she has a problem with Fabio's foliage.
"I don't wanna be in Fabio's tree."
FUCK!
Na
Onka goes on to explain the horror of Fabio's tree. And why you
don't want to be there. And how Fabio's tree is really just a
metaphor for his penis, and that shit just isn't cool. Especially
in mixed company like this, where they all have to get along and
they all have to live as a group.
Na Onka is saddened by Fabio's tree
Jeff
then probes to find out why Na Angel has such a big problem with Fabio.
So what's the deal, Nay? Do you just not like the guy?
"Nope."
Meanwhile,
the dark lord of the surf can't believe it. How DARE somebody
call him out for his evil at Tribal Council. I mean, HOW DARE THEY!
DOES THIS MOUTHY WONDERFUL BLACK ANGEL KNOW WHO SHE'S DEALING WITH??
But, true to the warrior spirit, Na Onka refuses to back down.
"He talks to me like I'm dumb."
"And I'm not afraid to say how I feel about him."
Na
Onka continues her tirade about how terrible Fabio is, and how evil he
is. And how equal pay for equal work is what women around
the world should be striving for, and how Fabio is against that.
And meanwhile, Fabio falls back on the only thing he can do whenever a hero backs him into a corner like this.
He looks up to see if he has any booby traps he can send crashing down onto her head
What the fuck? None? I didn't set up ANY?
And then she finishes with the catchphrase that Survivor fans around the world all instantly fell in love with.
"Fabio... I don't like you."
And BOOM.
Roasted.
Probst
is well aware that his main villain Fabio just got roasted by his hero.
And
he wants to be right there in the end zone to pile on like he always does.
"Fabio, she don't like you."
And with that, we have bedlam.
And just like that, Na Onka has now struck a blow in her attempts to take down the evil.
She has gotten under Fabio's skin.
She is now playing with his mind.
And here's the best part of all.
It won't be the last time
To Chapter 9 ---->
