The
Funny 115 - The Third One
#96. And
the Rivalry Continues
Philippines - episode 7
There aren't many things that I like about
returning player seasons, but one of the few things I DO like is when
they give me a nice recurring feud that I can keep writing about on the
Funny 115. And of course this entry is a perfect example of
that.
I'm sure you guys remember the feud between Probst and Jonathan Penner
that started back in Cook Islands.
I'm sure Jonathan remembers
If
you don't remember, let me link you to the first Penner/Probst fight
that I wrote about back on Version 2. This was the famous
"cannonball challenge", where Probst was yammering on incessantly like
he always does, and explaining the obvious, and Penner got so annoyed
by it that he basically told Probst to shut the fuck up. To
which
Probst then broke the fourth wall and explained to us at home that
"Jonathan is getting frustrated by me!"
Here is the entry
for that scene if you don't remember it. It is
personally one of my favorite entries on any of the Funny 115s.
WHY WON'T MY CANNONBALLS HIT THE TARGET?
Jonathan Penner, angry because he sucks at life
Shut up, would you? Jesus.
Jonathan, getting frustrated by me.
So yes, the relationship between Probst (the explainer) and Penner (the
complainer) hasn't always been on the best of terms.
And it didn't get much better in Micronesia, either.
If you guys don't remember the feud between Penner and Probst in
Micronesia, again, let me link you to one of my other
favorite entries on the Funny 115.
This
is the scene where Penner is complaining that his tile isn't breaking
correctly, and Probst verbally scolds him to do more throwing and less
whining. Here
is the write-up
if you don't remember the SECOND big blowup during a challenge between
the explainer and the complainer. Which culminates in Penner
summoning the power of his own buttocks.
Penner's tile refuses to break
"Penner, you got the same tiles, the same ropes."
"Awwww that SUCKS. Come on!"
"Bullllll! We say bullll! Bullll!
Bullllll!!!!"
"I mean... MY ASS!!!!"
"Airai, you need to stop bitching and start throwing."
So
anyway, yeah. Things haven't always been rosy between Jeff
Probst
and Jonathan Penner. Sometimes Probst is the one being a
dick,
other times Penner is the one being a dick. The two of them
are
like oil and water when it comes to squaring off during a challenge.
And that leads us into our third big
blowup between the two of them.
This one happens during Philippines
Remember
how I said that sometimes Penner is being a dick, and other times
Probst is being a dick? Well this one is a little different
because it is all Probst. This is one of those rare instances
where Penner doesn't do anything to annoy anyone, yet Probst still
decides to take a dig at him and try to blow up his game, just because
he is the host and because he can.
On my podcast, The
Survivor Historians, this is what my friend
and co-host Jay Fischer likes to describe as "A Jeff
Probst Dick Moment."
Watch, and you'll see what I mean.
It's the merge episode of Survivor: Philippines, and the
tribes are competing for individual immunity for the first time
This is that sadistic challenge where you have to hold up
twenty five percent of your body weight for as long as you can
It's pretty brutal
So the challenge starts.
The players stand there and they try to hold their bucket up for as
long as they can.
Meanwhile,
Probst stands off to the side and he does what he always does.
He just yammers on and on because he's Probst and
because he
thinks that this somehow makes the challenge better.
"Everyone
holding up their bucket. This is incredibly painful.
Winning this would be a big move and it would give me a giant Jeff
boner."
The players are forced to listen to this as they struggle to hang on
"That
rope is a 75/25 blend of rayon and nylon. It is the thickest
material known to man. Also the human head weighs eight
pounds."
Penner struggles with the weight, just like everyone else
"PEOPLE, YOU'VE GOT TO DIG! YOU HAVE TO WANT IT!"
Also, have you seen my impression of Micronesia's
Tracy Hughes-Wolf?
The
challenge doesn't last very long. Partly because the buckets
are
heavy, and partly because it's hot out and because Jeff is annoying.
But sooner or later, the players begin to drop out.
Skupin is the first one to drop out
"Mike Skupin is out of this challenge."
Then Pete drops out right after
"Pete is out of this challenge."
And now comes the fun part.
Jonathan Penner is barely hanging on. He knows he
isn't going to last much longer.
And just like that, Penner is out.
smuff
And what does Jeff say about this?
Does
he simply point out that Penner is out of the challenge, like he did
with Skupin and Pete? Or like he does with EVERY OTHER player
in
the game aside from Penner?
No, because this is Jonathan Penner, and because Probst has a history
with him, he says something a little bit different.
Like I said, this is a perfect example of "A Jeff Probst Dick Moment
(tm)."
Well, I'm out.
"Penner is out of this game and in TROUBLE at tonight's
Tribal Council!"
Penner hears Probst basically telling everyone to vote him
out tonight and he whips his head around
"Well thank you, for..."
Penner doesn't even bother to finish his sentence.
Okay Jeff, you hate me. We get it. Thank you for
being a douche about it.
Ah, fuck it. I'll just sit down.
And, of course, Probst can't resist one last little dig at the guy he
always has problems with.
"Glad you're on the show, Jonathan."
(begrudgingly) "Thank you buddy. Me too."
This
isn't one of the most hilarious entries on the countdown, but it is one
of those cute little character moments that is so much better when you
know the history between the two characters. Probst got
Penner's
goat (by breaking the fourth wall) back in Cook Islands, and Penner got
back by being snippy with him during the tile challenge in Micronesia.
And then in their third go-around, this time Probst took the
initiative by essentially telling people they should be voting for
Penner at the first individual Tribal Council in Philippines.
Like
I said, I normally don't like anything about returning player seasons.
But if there's a chance that Penner could come back for a
fourth
time, and he could ruin another challenge for Probst in Survivor 36 or
whatever, I think it would be a lot of fun. I mean, Probst is
now
ahead 2-1. It's only fair if Penner gets a chance to even it
up.
Let's make that happen, producers.
Boston Rob got four chances, why don't I? That's bollocks.
P.S. A couple of people have mentioned to me
that the way they interpreted this scene was that Probst was actually warning
Penner. Since the players were planning to blindside Penner
at
Tribal Council tonight, Probst was actually trying to tip him off that
he might want to play his idol. I don't know if this is true
or
not (I doubt anyone knows for sure) but if it is, it would totally
change the relationship between the two JPs, and then this
entry
becomes pointless. So for the purposes of the Funny 115,
let's
just say that Probst was taking a dig at Penner because he likes
getting a reaction out of him, and because that is much funnier.
Although,
honestly, no matter what Jeff Probst's motives were, it is still a
"Jeff Probst Dick Moment" either way. I mean, if the players
are
planning to blindside Penner, why is the host trying to tip him off and
ruin their blindside? Either way, the host is trying to
influence
the game by sticking his nose into it, and it is still a dick move.
Oh, and here
is a good clip of Jeff Probst talking about Penner and his
relationship with him over the years.
P.P.S.
Some good feedback from KorgDTR2000 on Reddit: "I
love
this moment specifically because Penner cuts himself off halfway
through snapping at Jeff. It's like a movie series where
there's
a running gag and by the third entry it's not really funny anymore so
they go meta with it."
P.P.P.S.
More from KorgDTR2000: "Another thing I realized
with this
entry is that this is really the only time where a player's most
dynamic counterpoint is with the host. There are so many great duos in
Survivor, ranging from Rich and Rudy in Borneo to Scot and Jason in
Kaoh Rong, yet Penner is the only player whose most memorable
relationship is with the host (and I'm not counting Jeff's weird
one-sided mancrush on Boston Rob either). I think that's why I would
always be open to seeing Penner play again, because his straight man is
always going to be there and thus he'll always deliver."
P.P.P.P.S. Probst's nefarious plan didn't even
work. R.C. went home that night instead.
Jeff Probst can eat me
** Thanks to kidnifty for
the Carolyn/Brad Culpepper pic **
